Why does personal style matter?
There is a psychological phenomenon you may have experienced where what you wear influences how you think, feel, and behave. It’s called enclothed cognition. And it doesn’t just act on us internally, it also influences those around us. It’s not hard to believe that when you wear something that takes your confidence up a notch, others imagine that you’re a more competent, trustworthy leader. Like it or not, we are all wired to make snap judgements based on appearance. And there are real-world consequences to how you look when you show up in the job market, dating pool, friendship circles, etc.
That’s not to say that everyone should look the same – your version of “polished and professional” will look much different than mine, and that’s perfect. The sweet spot is authenticity with a nod towards the occasion, which should dictate whether you’re in sweats or a power suit or somewhere in between. Whatever the circumstance, if you’re dressed up as someone else, other people will notice, and usually not in a good way. Your style should reflect your personality.
The other important aspect here is that a cohesive style is less chaotic for your day-to-day life. And being selective about what you purchase saves you oodles of money in the long run. When all of your clothes and accessories largely work together, you don't have to spend much time or energy choosing what to wear; just select something appropriate for the occasion and look effortless wherever you go.
How do you find your signature style?
Personality is the most important thing that most people miss when thinking about their style. If you want to feel like the best version of your authentic self, stop trying to look like everyone else. Here is permission to appreciate a variety of aesthetics, and recognize that they’re not all going to be the best for you. Think about the fabrics, the cuts, and the overall vibe – does it match your energy? When you look at yourself each day in the mirror, you should be able to think, “yes, this is how I want to show up today.” You are rarely going to see me in the latest trends from the it girls – they look cool, but most don’t make sense on me.
I think of four main ideas when it comes to nailing your signature style:
Color: You may have hangups around certain colors because of things you’ve heard over the years. (BTW, white does not make you look fat, and black doesn’t do too most people any favors.) Here’s what actually matters:- Your level of contrast. Think of black and white as having the largest amount of contrast. Think of white and light beige or gray as having low contrast. Now, think about the features in your face (hair, skin, natural eye and lip color) – take a black and white photo if you’re unsure about how much contrast is there. If your darkest features have high contrast with your lightest features, you have high contrast and things like black, optic white, and heavily saturated, bold colors may look great on you. If your lightest features blend in pretty closely with your darkest features, more muted colors will be better – think pastels, or colors that have a bit of grey or brown mixed in. Cream and dark grey, navy, or olive will be better than true black and white. If you’re in-between on the contrast scale, like me, maybe a soft black and more saturated colors will work, but neither fuscia and bright orange nor really muted pastels will be your best bets. Don’t get too hung up on this. If you put on a color that is too bright/saturated, your face will sort of fade away; if you require contrast and wear something too muted, it will have the same effect.
- Whether you lean “cool” or “warm.” On some people this is obvious, but for a lot of us, there is a mix of cool and warm features. Overall, cool colors have a blue base and warm colors have yellow. You can make a traditionally cool color like blue warm by adding a bit of yellow or brown. For now, if you know you have a more “golden” tone to your complexion, hair, etc., you may look better in colors that have a warm quality (including cool colors like green and blue that are toned warm). If you have a more “ashy” tone in your skin or hair, the cooler colors with a gray undertone may look best. Don’t get too hung up on this. If you like red, find the kind of red that feels harmonious.
Fabrication: Think about what kind of fabrics fit the vibe you’re trying to exude. How do you want to feel, and how do you want those around you to feel? Does what you’re wearing look like armor on you, or does it draw people in? If you’re a soft, quiet cuddlebug, you’re going to look much better in a draped, snuggly sweater than an angular studded distressed denim motorcycle jacket. For a jacket like that to make people feel drawn to you instead of repelled, you need to have a certain amount of swagger.
Activity: Don’t let this be an excuse to keep you from feeling great. On any given day, I run or swim, teach pilates, work at a desk, attend networking events, and have small children climbing on me. Wait for clothes that fit your lifestyle and jive with your colors, fit, and personality. Invest in pieces that you can wear different ways. There’s no rule saying you have to wear a black tank and tights to exercise if that doesn’t go with the rest of your style. Better to have pieces that work harmoniously for all aspects of your life. If you must wear a uniform that doesn’t feel like you, add accessories that do. Make it easy and have one or two pieces of jewelry, bags, or shoes that are durable and super versatile and, most importantly, make you feel awesome.
Read on for my thoughts on some of the popular color/style systems.
0 comments